Baby Boy Three: Birth Story 3 of 3

Although baby number 3 waited until nearly 41 weeks to finally bless us with his arrival, yes one week past our due date, when he was ready….he came in the quickest of all three!  The doctor agreed to give me until Tuesday to go on my own and it was Sunday morning. We had settled on a girl name 7 years ago when expecting our oldest, so we knew if we had a girl the name was going to be Stella Rae.  We are traditionalists when it comes to baby names and Stella was his Granny’s name and Rae would become a fourth-generation name beginning with my grandpa Ray, then my Uncle Ray, and my middle name is Rae.  We had not completely settled on our boy name until what we did not realize was only hours before delivery.  We knew the middle name was going to be Ray but Robert had decided he wanted a biblical name to go with Ray. 

 

Around 6:30 a.m. on Sunday, January 26^th, I informed Robert that I was starting to have contractions at 15 minutes apart and that we should probably begin to think about getting the boys somewhere and us to the hospital.  He had been reading in his Farmer’s Almanac and Bible and came back while I was finishing getting myself ready for the day… yes of course I wasn’t going to the hospital looking like a mess and  said, “What do you think about the name, Jacob Ray?”  I loved it! 

 

After dropping the boys off with The Ninja (see previous blog, if I just lost you), we decided to read about Jacob from the Bible between contractions to make sure he wasn’t a Judas… we want to at least begin his life on a positive note.   We learned that he was the youngest brother and made a promise to God to give 10% of everything he was blessed with back to God, hence inspiring 10% tithing. He was however a little bit manipulative as a child with his older sibling, but who isn’t?

 

We arrived at the hospital around 9:15 and our newest addition was delivered and in my arms by 9:45! I really wanted to go on my own without being induced and I got my wish…however my plan was not to go at it without an epidural or any pain meds because I have always said that there is a difference between tough and crazy.  Well just call me crazy because there was zero time for any pain meds.  They got my IV in minutes before the baby arrived and didn’t actually officially check me into the hospital until I was holding my newborn baby boy, Jacob Ray. 

My Father-in-law...The Ninja

When I was first introduced to my in-laws, we were a little uncertain of each other.  My father-in-law was especially unsure of me dating his youngest son.  The Pistol Annie’s song, “Hell on Heels,” comes to mind when I reflect on his first impression of me.  However 12 years later, I now know that although he has a tough exterior, he is really a big softy!

His behind the back nickname, The Ninja, began because he always seems to come out of nowhere to protect his family and farm.  He somehow knows when we pull into the driveway and times his call perfectly as we walk in the door.  He can sense when someone is at our house and will double check the person’s purpose for being there. 

Last spring, a friend came to pick strawberries and within 5 minutes of her arrival, he knew she was there, and came over to make she was not an intruder.  Her text she sent me was, “The ninja caught me.”

A few years back a neighbor had an insurance agent come to his house to look at a vehicle that was located in his garage.  My father-in-law with a weapon in hand and the person’s license plate number recorded, approached the man asking, “Are you buying or stealing today?” The guy dropped his clipboard, and terrifyingly explained he was trying to make arrangements for the truck to be fixed! 

Typically when I am going to have visitors, I try to let him know so he does not worry.  However on one occasion I forgot to give him a call to let him know my family from Terre Haute was coming to visit.  As my family and I were standing in a circle talking, he proceeded to speed his Kawasaki Mule down my driveway and through the middle of the circle we were standing in and explained without stopping, “Just making sure there weren’t any freaks bothering you,” and drove off.  After my dad stopped cracking up, he voiced that he was thankful that he does not have to worry about my safety.

As we have been expecting our current child, he always makes sure that there is someone on, "Jamie Duty," in case I need anything. Then just yesterday, I had car trouble and my husband, brother-in-law, and of course The Ninja all came to my rescue with a car trailer, truck and every possible supply to get me and my vehicle home. 

Through the years, I have learned that although it takes time to build trust with a ninja, once you do, you and your family are always protected!

Another Surprise Boy: Birth Story 2 of 3

It was March 16^th and I was a little over 38 weeks pregnant and beginning to wonder if this baby was ever going to enter the world.  We were going to Robert’s parents’ house for supper and I decided I was going to walk over there.  You see I was entering the stage of pregnancy that many women enter titled, “walk the baby out.”  So I tackle the few hills and walk at a brisk pace, eat hardly anything, and return home the same way.  I am sure the rest of the family thought I was a little crazy and they were probably correct but I had a baby to walk out! 

When I arrived home, I began feeling the tightening that I remember so well when Carson arrived.  I knew we were going to the hospital that evening.  So I of course think, oh I have done this before, no big deal, we have all kinds of time.  Robert and Carson arrive home shortly after me.  I think he waited a bit before leaving to make sure I did not end up on the side of the road somewhere on my insistent walk home.  I told Robert to go feed his cows and complete any farm tasks he needed to and I would give Carson a bath and get his parents to come over because we were going to the hospital.  All the while, we are taking our sweet time. We get Carson settled with Granny and Pappy and then head for the hospital.  As we get closer to the hospital, mamma is feeling some pain.  By the time we arrive and I had to stand up to walk through the doors, I swear I thought that baby was going to fall out on the floor!

We were checked in and my regular doctor was at a NASCAR race (couldn’t make it up), so her partner was on call.  Of course he did not know me from any other crazy, pregnant lady so was not in a big hurry to keep me.  Robert, spoke up and informed the nurse that this baby was coming tonight and we were not leaving and if they forced us to we were going to the next closest hospital.  Typically my husband is mild mannered but you mess with his family, you better brace yourself.  They decided to keep us and a give me the much needed epidural and by 1:30 in the morning we were greeted with a St. Patrick’s Day surprise….a  baby boy, Gavin!

Surprise Entry: Birth Story 1 of 3

Naturally when you have your first baby, you have read all of the books, talked to friends and you think you totally know everything that is going to happen during the entire birthing process.  Guess what… you're clueless! Child birth is one of those experiences you have to encounter yourself to understand.  

It was a Friday and I had big plans for the day.  It was the last day of my school’s spring break.  I had a doctor’s appointment in the morning and the doctor said was it wouldn’t be long but looking back, I think she totally know she was going to see me again that day.  I was a little over 36 weeks along and one of my goals was to finish my Master’s degree before I had this baby.  Luckily that Friday I got everything wrapped up and turned in.  At this point I still think I have 4 weeks left before baby comes, see clueless. I think I am living up to my reputation of getting things turned in early.   Wrong again, I was a procrastinator and didn’t even know it!

I went home that evening and of course the baby had found a comfortable spot directly on top of my bladder.  That made for an interesting evening.  I prayed at supper that evening that I would know when it was time to go to the hospital.  I did not want to be one of those moms who overreacted, went to the hospital and then got sent home.  I had already done than once!  It felt like the "inexperienced mother’s walk of shame."

As the evening progressed I kept experiencing tightening around the baby and it was beginning to hurt and of course I had to pee every 5 seconds since my new darling loved to cuddle, squeeze, and kick my bladder. Finally after this occurred for a bit, I woke my husband and let him know that it was time to go to the hospital.  Of course he was just humoring me and being a supportive husband but he was thinking that we were going to be sent home again.  However one look at me and he knew it was the real deal!  He immediately began grabbing our bags and the car seat and throwing everything in the car.  Did you know you can make it from Evanston, IN to Owensboro, KY in about 20 minutes? 

I did not call my sisters and parents yet because I was scared of the repeated “inexperienced mother’s walk of shame.”  After we got checked in and realized okay we are going to have a baby, it was the wee hours of the morning.  The baby wasted no time and blessed us with his presence around 9 a.m.  Since we did not know the sex of the baby, when the baby came out, the doctor flipped the baby around with the baby’s butt being under her arm and said we are all going to find out at the same time.  She flipped him around and that is when we knew we had a Carson!  

That's My Cowboy

       While being in Indianapolis, I am reminded of how happy I am living in our rural home where our kids can run and play outside with limited worries.  I am not a fan of parking garages and bumper to bumper traffic.  And although I enjoy an occasional visit to the city, my husband, simply tolerates it. 
       Last New Year’s Eve we celebrated my twin sisters’ 30^th birthday in Indianapolis at the Hyatt and had a great time.   Despite all of the fun during the holiday celebration, there is one specific memory about this trip, I will never forget.
       Winter weather was expected and according to my husband, there was no way he was going to get stuck in Indy.  After all what if we get stuck, how would the farm possibly survive without us for more than one night?! Therefore we took the Dodge Ram, 4x4 diesel to Indianapolis with us and let me tell you those roads and side streets are not made for farm trucks! Since we were staying at the Hyatt, we naturally had to park in a dreaded parking garage with the height clearance being 6ft 9 inches.  Not sure if we can clear this my husband proclaims as he pulls over, and yes he pulls right over to the curb in downtown Indy.  Then he proceeds to get out of his truck, pull a tape measure from inside the door and measure his truck height!  And to further give you an accurate visualization of this scenario the truck has a, “If you can’t Dodge it, Ram it license plate,” on the front and since we were going to change before the festivities, he had on work boots.  The truck height measurement was 6 ft 8 inches.... one inch lower than the clearance height! 
       As you pull up to the parking garage, guests are greeted and offered valet parking.  However the gentleman offering this service, takes one look at my husband and says, “Self-park, right?”  My husband responds with, “Yeah I better park this one.”  The valet agrees by adding, “Yeah, she’s a big oh girl!”  Just for the record, he was talking about the truck!
       It was a tight fit but we made it.  The former me would have been mortified by this situation but the current me, laughed hysterically… that’s my cowboy. 

God and his sense of humor

This past week marked the point in my pregnancy that allowed us to have an ultrasound to see our growing baby.  A decision couples always have to make is whether or not they are going to find out the sex of the baby.  Unlike most individuals of the world, my husband truly believes that there should be a law against finding out the gender until birth.  Needless to say, he is a bit of a traditionalist. 

I on the other hand, typically have a modern attitude about most life events and my type A personality traits actually point to all signs of me finding out.  However it means so much to my husband not find out and it really is the most amazing surprise.  Therefore I go along with this idea of letting the baby’s sex be revealed at birth.  The fun for me is trying to figure out what the sex of the baby is without the doctor or ultrasound technician telling me or confirming this information. 

With the ultrasound of our first child, the hospital had just installed a new sonogram machine so there was nearly an entire hospital staff in the room with us.  Even though it was clear we did not want to know the gender, one the nurse’s looked at the screen and right away announced, “Oh, I see it, I know what it is!”  My thoughts were, seriously lady, I am not an idiot!  Therefore when Carson arrived, I was not entirely surprised he was a boy.  Although since we were not directly informed, there was still some element of surprise. 

 When our second child was born, we were truly uncertain if he was going to be a boy or girl.  I could not read any indications on the technician’s face, my doctor does not find out when the patient doesn’t and I did not catch anything on the ultrasound screen representing he was a boy. 

 Now with this third child, I did want to find out.  However I also wanted my husband to have his fun.  Therefore, my goal was to find out the gender of the baby without being told.  During our ultrasound, I studied the screen very thoroughly.  The baby was very energetic and bounced and flipped around the entire time….obviously my child.  I feel pretty certain that I saw the clue that this baby is a third boy.  Also when the doctor came in and we told her we were having another surprise baby she responded with, “I hope it is a girl.”  I immediately looked over at the technician to try to gauge her facial features and her eyes grew, indicating to me she did not want the doctor to say that again.   

There is still very much a degree of uncertainty of what the sex of our baby is going to be, however I am thrilled either way.  The baby is perfectly healthy and if God wants to give us another boy, he must think we are doing pretty well with the two we have or else he just has a hilarious sense of humor!

Rivals to built in best friends

     As a child, having siblings typically means being annoyed most of the time, having regular bruises, and of course getting in trouble for an offense you didn’t commit.  As I watch my boys grow, I try not to be too terribly frustrated when they have days when they argue and bicker continually.  Every single disagreement they have is basically the same scenario… Gavin irritates Carson by following, touching or copying him and then Carson hits or tackles Gavin, causing Gavin to end up crying and tattling.  Oddly when Gavin tattles, he never seems to remember what he did that caused Carson’s retaliation.

      Although I am now becoming accustomed to watching boys fight, I grew up with younger, twin sisters and when girls fight, it’s a form of art! Precious treasures mysteriously disappear, the light cryptically shut off while you are showering, and phone messages never make it to the recipient…weird, right?  For a period of time I had my sisters trading me dimes for nickels because I convinced them that the nickels were worth more because they were bigger. My sister Jennifer used to grow her finger nails out so she could claw when necessary and Julie actually chucked a dressed cheeseburger at Jennifer’s face once.  However after a period of time, this merciless torture transformed.

      Shortly after I entered high school and my sisters jr. high, the idea of making each other’s lives miserable began to lighten and although the challenge of giving each other a difficult time continued, it became clear, that although we can irritate each other, outsiders were not allowed to participate in the scrutiny!  One occasion I had an ex-boyfriend swerve in the road towards me and although he was not a serious threat, my little sister jumped on her bike, peddled to the grocery store where he worked and proceeded to read him his pedigree, completely humiliating him!  

        As adults, siblings become your built in best friends.  They understand your insecurities and are not afraid to tell you when you look hideous or are acting like a troll. They are always in your corner and always know just what to say. 

        I have shared some of these stories with my boys in hopes of not actually giving them more ideas of how to torture each other, but to teach them that even though they do  not realize it now, one day they will be grateful for each other.  I also share these stories with my students with embellished details, since they usually hear them through my writing.  And the fun part about sharing stories such as these with my students, versus my own kids is any ideas they develop are not my problem to correct….sorry parents!